In my fervent prayers, I would always ask Him why I need to be involved in situations that I feel I'm not capable of doing. Often, I would question: "Had I not taken the science of the mind, would I be free from the co-dependency that I'm into while my youngest sibling undergo his program in a therapeutic community?" "Is my undergraduate course a curse in the life that I have now?" And the list of questions just keeps on adding up while I stay awake 'til dawn asking "Why am I entangled in a relationship with a man who fathered my son and keeps on frustrating me every single day?" "Why in the whole wide universe did He allow me to be part of the league of women who stumbled in an unhealthy affair?" "Why on earth have I met this liquor-lover, malingering ex(?)-addict?" "Why should I be a manic-depression victim and be an unemployed, pathetic mom?" Harsh isnt it? A lot says so. That is why I have to transcend from them the soonest before I hear my son ask me "Why, mom?" I have to stand firm for deciding that my youngest brother be brought in the facility and eventually, bring the father of my son to a substance rehabilitation center. I could have wasted alot of time in the last five years but TODAY, I pray that finally...I can rise from the ashes and clear all the cobwebs of my past. Although, I feel that my adorable son is a blessing from heaven, I can't help but regret at times my inappropriate decisions. Especially, for not choosing the best father that he can have. What do I say now? "Enough!". Enough for all the dark past which have enveloped every part of my pesrona. Enough about ranting and grumbling that my dad has been forgoing all my requests that I migrate. Enough about the bitterness that each setback has caused me. Enough about my son's father disappointing me and breaking all his promises. Enough about blaming myself for being a part of my youngest brother's ordeal. Finally...
